An Independent Woman

          My Aunt Anne, one of my mom's sisters, was a woman I admired my entire life.  She was a single woman who lived in an era when unattached women were admonished, considered old maids and spinsters. She never married, yet she made a wonderful life for herself.  My aunt was a conscientious worker, she built a successful career with the Federal Government, rising among the ranks, earning a paycheck that enabled her to live a full and satisfying life.  Aunt Anne  possessed genuine inner and outer beauty, she was poised and pretty, almost glamorous, with striking stature and an affinity for dressing well.  I especially remember a pair of green suede high heel pumps I admired that she wore with a suit to match.  Her Washington, D.C. apartment was always neat and tidy and when I went there to visit with her, I loved to play with her cosmetic tray filled with various perfume bottles and hairbrushes.  She was strong and independent, well-traveled,thoughtful and loving, and she was a 'girlie-girl'.         

          Although Aunt Anne had no children of her own, she exemplified filial dedication.  She was enormously generous and kind, never forgetting to send gifts to her nieces or nephews on their birthdays.  She took pleasure in remembering everyone in the family with souvenirs from her travels around the world, like the Great Wall of China, Paris or Dublin. When she died, each of my brothers and cousins [from London to Atlanta, from San Francisco to New York] expressed the closeness we felt to her as we gathered around my dining room table and told our stories about Aunt Anne.  Each of us felt like she was our surrogate mother; he was admired by all who were fortunate to knew her.  

          Aunt Anne succeeded in a career, traveled extensively, dressed to kill, and was adoring and adored.  But most important, she was my inspiration and role model.  I learned from her that women can enjoy their femininity and be a whole person. I never took the opportunity to tell her but I think she knew.  I learned from her that a woman can live a fulfilling life all by herself without a man to take care of her.  She confessed to me once that she lived an unusual life as a single woman in a period when it was not the norm.  I know she had a little angst, but basically, she was very happy as she was, unencumbered.  It may not have been her preferred path, however she truly made lemonade out of lemons.  I learned from her that many choices and possibilities are available to each of us and granted me permission, as Marlo Thomas' famous recording espoused, 'to be free to be me'.